Doubt is more than a five-letter word that sounds harmless to the ear. Doubt is a world in itself; a parallel universe as real as the outside world. It’s a maze in which all of us get stuck at some point. Its main landmarks are confusion, indecision, and denial.
Self-doubt comes from a very deep place, from inside our own darkness. If self-awareness or mindfulness sound like bullshit to you, then I’m telling you this: you’re not at the end of your troubles.
Indecision and inactivity will remain in your life as long as you have no clue about your purpose, the value of your talents, or the reasons behind your fear. When you’re lost like that, you’re like a dead leaf on the ground being pushed here and there every time the wind blows. You can kiss consistency goodbye, let alone success. You have the potential to be a solid rock, but right now, you’re a leaf that doesn’t stand its ground… and this can’t keep happening! Right?
Relationship doubts sever family ties and dismantle marriages so fast you wouldn’t see it coming, so slow you don’t realize it’s even happening, and so cunningly you wouldn’t know that something wrong has already distorted your tedious life. The absence of trust and lack of openness are like a small campfire that keeps flickering throughout the night. It looks harmless, but when you wake up in the morning, you see that half of the forest is burned and there’s nothing you can do about it. We can never undo fire, it’s true; but we can always save what’s left!
Doubting in the holy is close to worshiping the unholy. Broken souls with no enlightenment opportunities or transcendence ambitions are capable of doing the unspeakable. Doubt is the primal source on which evil feeds. Nothing tantalizes bad fortune as much as an easy prey that smells like fresh shame and tastes like pure violence. Humans are afraid of the dark by nature; however, the fear that evil inspires is something else. Mainly because we forget to think about the angel guarding us and focus on the demon paralyzing us. I’m glad we are responsible for that part, at least!
All sorts of doubts circle us like sharks in the sea, like monsters waiting for us to step out of our fortress. It’s an epidemic that’s tormenting us and poisoning our entire planet. But, in this primitive swamp called society, some of us shine like a lighthouse.
There’s a lot of work that needs to be done, but before we rescue the damned, let’s examine ourselves first. Look into your own heart. Hold on tight to your hopes and cherish your sweetness. Accept your imperfections and work on bettering yourself.
Build the new you form there. It will sound farfetched at first, but when you make the first step and feel empowered, you’ll feel unstoppable. Harness this energy and make as much work as you can, because at some point, doubt may reemerge to shake you.
Take a deep breath, shut your eyes to visualize your guardian angel beating the crap out of your demons, and rebuild the newer you from there. It’s an endless journey that we call ‘life’. We all have it, but not all of us live it.
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